The Negative Creep
My personal blog

A Night at the 'Purple Peace'

By Rahul Jha

Anil: Look that girl’s got a Punjabi in her eyebrows… (Pointing at the girl with a piercing in her left eyebrow)

Vikram: What the fuck are you talking about?

A: She’s got a ‘Pier Singh’… get it? Pier--- Singh…

V: God, stop it… that was terrible…

A: Get a life man, I was just trying to cheer you up… Did your sense of humour break up with you too?

V: Hey, c’mon, no more ‘break-up’ references…

A: Achha, sorry sorry…

[Anil and Vikram were hanging out on a Friday night at ‘The Purple Peace’, a dingy pub in the heart of the city.]

A: So, all the talk about ‘I have moved on’ was shit. You still love her, don’t you?

V: Of course not. Why should I? She’s the one who left me.

A: Oh, you said you left her. Now that’s some good whiskey. Ek aur lana… (to the bartender)

V: Ya whatever yaar. You are not being much of a help. It was a mistake coming here with you today…

A: Ok I’m sorry yaar, I … (cut-short)

V: You know it’s all my fault. I screwed up. I always do. Chal shots martein hain… Bhai, shots please…

A: Ya, that’s like my boy. For life is too short… let’s have shot after shot…

V: Kya kuch bhi bol raha hai… We used to have shots. Aditi would always throw up after that. Then she would almost fall asleep, and I had to carry her back… She said she’ll never leave me…

[The DJ starts playing “Goodbye to Romance”]

A: Yeah baby… Goodbye to Romance… Yeah… [singing]

V: Goodbye to friends… I tell you [singing]

A: Or Girlfriend, in your case… [chuckles]

V: C’mon man, I really miss her… I realize how I got so used to her… How can I do without her… I’m so hollow now…

A: She was like Nicotine. She part of your metabolism. Leaving her is like quitting smoking, difficult at first, but good in the long run.

V: I donno man… Nicotine? Well, she did leave a burn in my heart …

A: She burnt your heart ‘coz she was hot. Did you smoke her? [chuckles again]

V: I still remember our hearts were pounding so hard… she had that look in her eyes… It’s as if time stopped for a second… And that’s when I took the first puff of my sweet Nicotine…

A: Woohoo… and then… did you do it?

V: Shut up you pervert…

A: I thought the shots were really working. Anyways, it’s the last call… Let’s grab a few beers and sit by the riverside.

V: River, where is a river here?

A: After a few more beers you’ll cry me a river… Cry me a river [singing]

V: Anyways let’s get out of here… I think I’ll call her…

A: Call her? God no…

V: No, I need to do this. [Fumbling with the phone] I realize I still haven’t forgotten her. I need to confront my problems and not hide from them.

A: Yeah baby, but I think that’s the alcohol talking… Not you…

V: You I had proposed her when I was drunk, maybe it will work again…

A: Lightning doesn’t strike twice at the same place… but I think she’s out of town, so you can try once again… Chal mere sher… Let’s do this!!!

[They pay the bill, and get some extra beer cans and start to move out of the pub]

A: Wo dekh teri Nicotine.

V: Arey she’s Pier Singh, not Nicotine…

A: Oh, anyways, I don’t mind taking a puff of her. Bye Pier Singh… Miss you…

[They leave the pub. Come outside, sit in a desolate park. The park is desolate because it’s late into the night. They sit down on a bench]

V: (opening a can of beer) you know, we used to sit on a park bench near pond, talk for hours. Her eyes were so pretty under the moonlight. (sighs…)

A: Did you kiss her? Because smoking is banned in public places… (with his signature smirk)

V: Ya, we used to smoke in so many places. I miss her. I really do… Can’t she comeback?

A: Maybe you can get into her sleep and plant an idea to Love you again. Inception you see…

V: Forget getting into her sleep, her dreams… I’d do anything to even get close to her bed. I’m calling her.

[He picks up the phone. Dials Aditi’s number.]

Phone: The Number you are dialing does not exist anymore.

V: Goddammit she changed her number… She wants me out of her life…

A: Well, you know, I hate to break this to you, but Aditi does not exist. Neither do I. You are suffering from schizophrenia. We are just figments of your imagination.

V: Shut the fuck up. Pehle ‘Inception’, ab ‘Shutter Island’…

A: Main tumhe kaise samjhaon

V: Ok, I’m so pissed, I’ll piss on you. If you don’t freak out, you don’t exist. (Trying to unzip his pants..)

A: Arey arey stop… Ok Ok.. I’m real, She’s real. (getting up in a hurry…)

V: The very thought of my nicotine going up in smoke makes me mad. The joke’s not as funny when the joke’s on you, is it…

A: Arey sorry yaar… Tu bura maan gaya

(Suddenly Vikram’s phone rings. An Unknown number flashes. Vikram answers…)

V: Hello

Phone: Vikram…

V: Aditi…

[To be continued]

 

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